"Years ago He was a swinging speck in the distance;
now He is close enough I can hear His singing.
Soon I will see the lines on His face."
(taken from Blue Like Jazz)
Six years ago today,
my Dad met His Savior
face to face.
I can't imagine what that must have been like.
Or what it will be like.
We wrote letters to my dad
for his 70th birthday,
three months before he was diagnosed.
This was his last birthday.
Here are excerpts from my letter:
"You know you're my hero. I always tell you that and it never fails, you always laugh in disbelief. So, I figured what better time to take a walk down memory lane and prove to you just why and how you became my first true love.
The first memories I have of falling in love with you are those when I was around 4 or 5. Our "before bed" routines would always end in your bedroom right after our night session of "Bullfight". Mom would be blow-drying our hair, finishing with the classic line, "Dad, aren't they the most beautiful girls ever?" You'd agree and motion for us to jump in the bed for story time. Oh the adventures we embarked upon. The most fun, of course, was the dramatic journey through the wardrobe and being introduced to Narnia and Aslan in "The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe". Dad, you were and still are the BEST storyteller I've ever known. What a precious gift that even now your grandchildren are sharing in. Thank you for showing me how to love without limits, despite the stressful day at the office you might have had.
Thank you for my first date when I was in pre-school. I had won a dinner for two and Mom dressed me up and curled my hair. You were in your suit and tie and I was sooo nervous! I just kept thinking, "this is my first date with a boy!" The butterflies in my stomach kept me from eating my dinner at Jason's Deli. After that date, you had me Dad. Remember how I'd cry to you saying I wasn't going to ever marry if I couldn't marry you?! Dad, thank you for showing me for the first time how a woman should be loved by a man as you loved and continue to love us and Mom so passionately and purely. You helped me set my standards for a husband, even if they are so ridiculously high that I may stay single for the rest of my life!
Thank you for the memories we shared every morning before school. I would get dressed and come down and watch you shave, tie your tie, put your suit on, all the while listening to James Dobson's "Focus on the Family". There were also the times you played Jesus in our passion play at church and I was the little girl that sat in your lap as you quoted, "let the children come unto me" and how special I felt. I remember how sad it made me to watch the soldiers beat you and hang you on that cross. Dad, thank you for showing me that love sacrifices and is unconditional, but most of all, thank you for introducing me for the first time to a personal, loving Savior, Who has transformed my life and given me reason to live and love in return.
Once I remember insisting on believing in Santa Clause, although you and Mom always told us he didn't exist. Donnie and I stayed up all night with milk and cookies on the table ready to see St. Nick. You let us, with no argument. I also remember insisting again on signing the cross-head to chest and shoulder to shoulder-after every prayer, just like our Catholic friends. You explained to me that it wasn't necessary but I wanted to be a little rebel of our charismatic church, I guess. You just laughed and let me, for you knew that this phase would last all of one day...maybe. Dad, thank you for teaching me the great lesson of patience, grace, and for letting me make my own decisions-guided of course by your gentle, Godly wisdom. Thank you for never taking your hand off of me.
How sweet were all the times when we've stayed out under the stars in Colorado as you pointed us in the direction of the North Star, the Big Dipper, Orion's Belt, and The Seven Sisters. I still look for those constellations when I'm out at night. And the boxing lessons we'd leave crying from and the many dance lessons in the living room that we all laughed through!
Dad, these were all such great times, but I remember the sleepless nights I've had too. Those nights I would come in crying and wake you and Mom up...not only would you let me climb in bed with you guys, but you would take me in your arms and I would finally fall peacefully asleep as you prayed in my ear.
Thank you doesn't even seem adequate for the life you've shown me and allowed me to lead. Thank you for the mutual sharing of fears and failures, hopes and dreams. You are the most precious gift I have ever received and I thank you for the legacy you are leaving for us all.
I love you Dad and Happy 70th Birthday!"
My dad no longer sees through a glass darkly,
as 1 Cor.13:12 states.
He has seen the lines on His face.
Very cool.
